there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
