How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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