Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
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