she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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