...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
