shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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