what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
