My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
