it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
