I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
