the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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