She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
My legs feel like baby dolphins
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
