Banned from zoo.
Again?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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