It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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