Need sex. Gaining weight.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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