yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize