What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
