Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
