i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize