Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
