everyone is single if you try hard enough
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
