Soap is not a condiment
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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