why didn't you poke me back
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize
