we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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