If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
this boner is exhausting
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
