He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
