Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I am naked and annoyed.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
