I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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