The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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