Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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