is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Randomize
