how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
