yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
