So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
