I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
