used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
