i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
