dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
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