I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
