chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
