It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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