dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
