Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
