Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
