Duck Duck Cougar?
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize