why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
