i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
