I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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