did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Randomize
