Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
