ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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