found the other keg... it's in the tree
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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